Amber McKenna

It started with reports of a 16-year-old girl calling a domestic abuse hotline. She said she had been married to and impregnated by a 49-year-old man, who had physically abused her at 15.

The result was hundreds of children of all ages without homes. These children can’t find a place in today’s society because they were raised in a culture reminiscent of 100 years in the past.  

Investigations into these reports led to the April 3 raid of the Yearning for Zion Ranch outside of El Dorado, Texas. The ranch itself was owned and run by a sect of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. At almost 1,700 acres, it was self-sustaining and mostly hidden to inquiring eyes by a rock formation.

According to Associated Press reports, the compound, disguised as a hunting retreat, has multiple dormitory buildings, a temple, sewage plant, medical clinic, food storage and processing facilities, watchtowers and 10-foot-high surrounding walls. It is said to have about 150 buildings.

After the search and seizure in early April, 437 children were removed from the ranch.

These children were subjected to DNA testing and examined for physical signs of abuse. The testing will help untangle the web of alleged incest, abuse, underage marriage and sex.

What is the state of Texas to do with more than 400 children out of a home? The children are being placed all around the state in temporary foster homes, group homes, boys ranches and women’s shelters.

Child Protective Services has its hands full. The goal of the temporary placement is to keep the children apart from others in an attempt not to change them.

These children have never been introduced to the world of pop culture. This means no television, no cereal, no manufactured foods, no jeans, no decision making and no talking back.

While some of these children might return to their parents after custody hearings, many will be put into foster homes, or able to choose their fate in the real world.

How will society deal with these children once they find their way into the mainstream?

The children will be bullied in the public school system and outcast among other foster children who have grown up with television and sometimes with drug and alcohol abuse.

The public school system is on another level. Children from the FLDS sect have been home schooled all their lives, and although they may be ahead in some subjects for their ages, other subjects may have been omitted completely. Imagine being 16 and knowing nothing about computers or cell phones.

The children who are about to turn 18 will have the option of choosing where they want to go. But is there a place for them?

They have basic skills and farm experience, but they cannot be expected to understand or even navigate the world of 2008 when they have been living in the 19th century for their entire lives.

The young mothers have it the toughest. These women, at ages 19 and 20, have multiple infants. They have no marketable skills. There is nothing for them without the support of the sect.

What this case needs is to put in place a serious immersion program for those from the polygamist ranch. It would take time and money to be sure, but the 400-something children need to be introduced to the modern world. They need to be taught essential principles and concepts and basic technological skills.

If the children choose to return to their way of life, secluded and out of date, they will know they are living in a place and time they don’t understand and doesn’t understand them.

Lizzie Martinez

The Senate Status Sheet is distributed to all Senators each Monday. Though it sounds
boring, the sheet tallies the current balances in every ASLC account, including Cabinet, Linfield Activities Board, clubs, intramural sports and student-run publications such as the Review.

The numbers were fascinating, to say the least. The budget comes from the approximately 1,750 students who pay the $200 per year student body fee. This comes out to about $350,000 our leaders have to plan events for us.

This budget allows LAB to host adventure activities like bungee jumping for a minimal cost to students. It also funds professional CatCabs, comedians and newly released movies, and the grand finale of the year: Wildstock, which comes with an array of games and free prizes. I’ve even heard rumors of the return of the bull riding machine and a new surf simulator.

All of these are fantastic, but with only four weeks of classes left, the majority of the money should be spent or already chartered for a specific cause, such as Wildstock. Yet, for many of the budgets, this is not the case.

For example, the Student Center budget has nearly $11,000 left; cultural events still have nearly $8,000 to spend; and $3,426.45 remains for musical entertainment.

Of the 46 clubs listed on the status sheet, half of them have not touched the $100 allotted to them this year.

Even more astonishing, the Activities Council still holds $13,8881.80 in reserve. Yet last week when I went, as the president of a club on campus, to request money for a fundraising event, I was turned down.

Granted, the council had valid reasons for rejecting the request—the event will be held off-campus and is community-oriented rather than focusing exclusively on Linfield students. But the event is also a charitable cause that will connect Linfield students with the greater community. Not to mention the club members have been actively involved in planning the event, which will feature student band Jack Ruby.

If the budget was tight, I could see how my club’s event would be the first to go in favor of other
student-centered events. However, the budget isn’t suffering right now, so this doesn’t make sense. The money Activities Council has comes from the students, and it should be used for students.

Seeing as the Activities Council cannot possibly spend the remainder of the money allotted to them for this year, what happens to the surplus?

This year the Hawaiian club spent a large amount of money to put on a great show. The cost of the tickets is a vital part of raising the money to bring in the band and some of the dancers, preparing the feast and paying for other things, yet ASLC did not offset the cost of student tickets.

General admission, $20, applied to everyone regardless of whether or not they attended Linfield. Students on the meal plan could have $5 taken from the meal cost; however, they still paid $20 total. The luau is an amazing show that is well worth the money spent to bring this special tradition each year. However, as a student event, there should have been a discount for students. 

When $120,000 is still left in ASLC coffers one month away from the end of the year, something is wrong. Though some of the money is already allotted to events, stipends and activities, it would be nearly impossible to empty out the account in one month.

The fee students pay—$200 per year—is a large one. It is only worth it if all of the money is spent responsibly on activities that benefit students. Whether this means increasing club budgets, allotting more money to clubs that request funds through Activities Council, planning higher-cost activities throughout the year or cutting the fee to start with, something needs to be done.

In general, our student body fees are used well, but we need to make sure as the end of the year approaches, the money is used appropriately, and any surplus is allotted to the right places. Ask your Senator about the topic.

Nicki Tyska

Because pet peeves are featured in this issue of the Review, I figured I’d share one of mine: disrespect.

Disrespect in general is just plain rude, but what upsets me most is when students disrespect their professors, especially in the classroom. What in the world makes people think this is OK?

In several of my classes this year, I’ve seen students mouth off to professors, treat them with a snobby attitude and blame the professor for a bad grade, forgetting they did not ask for help from said professor or anyone else in the class. Whose fault was that D again?

We all have one or two professors who just rub us the wrong way. We don’t like his or her teaching style or they’re confusing, too argumentative, rude, whatever. We complain about them to our friends or family as a way to vent all those frustrations. Keep it that way.

Being angry with a professor doesn’t give us the right to take it out on them. What if they happened to reciprocate and vented what you do that frustrates them in front of the entire class, making you the dunce in the corner? Doesn’t sound like a pleasant situation to me.

Professors hold their titles because of the years of effort they have put into their academic careers. Most, if not all, are working outside the classroom to become published authors, or to find better ways to teach material to students.

They continuously earn their doctorates. Many even give students the opportunities to work with them on research, and allow us to receive hands-on experience that looks fantastic on a résumé.

This whole diatribe comes down to the Golden Rule we all learned in kindergarten: Treat others the way you want to be treated. If your professor doesn’t extend the same courtesy to you, then go with a “kill ’em with kindness” approach.

For those of you who do treat your professors with the respect they deserve, thank you for stepping up. For those who don’t, learn how.

He says

When breaking up, come prepared.

Breakup season, apparently, is upon us.

I’ll be honest, since I learned about this season, I have been waiting for it impatiently. I cannot wait to break up with a few girlfriends. It is an absolutely freeing experience.

To truly revel in breaking up with a girl, you have to do it big. A lot of guys say, “Let her down easy.” That, Linfield male, is absurd. Easy is, well, easy. Do not go for the easy let-down. Make it big, painful and crushing. Make it dramatic. Nothing gets your point across like elaborate theater.

Basically, if you treat it like it is a painful tragedy for her, she will believe it to be a negative event in her life. That means she will think she wants you back, but probably only long enough to sleep with you.

The first and most obvious form of breakup is in skywriting. Skywrite “IT’S ALL OVER, SO-AND-SO. I NEVER LOVED YOU,” over her hometown, so her family calls her and inadvertently breaks the news. The sense of drama will be amplified if she hears it from them.

If you found out some secret about her, out her in public. At a ball game on the big screen tell her you can’t see her anymore because you can’t stand the thought that your children might have hypertrichosis like she does. This works even if she doesn’t have hypertrichosis.

My best breakup: First, you have to have a lot of access to her relationship history. If you control her like you should, this is easy information to get. If not, quiz her friends and family.

Get phone numbers and addresses for all of her ex-boyfriends. Get in touch with them and ask if they will help you break up with her. Get videos of each of them telling the story of when they realized they didn’t love her anymore.

Lure her into a dark room lined with HDTVs. These will be playing the videos of her ex-boyfriends. Call your uncle (or my uncle, he loves doing this) at the Industrial Light and Magic Company and have him whip up a program that will gradually morph each of their faces into your face.

By the end, it will be 10 to 20 images of you telling different stories, and they should all end at the exact same time with a chorus of: “And that’s when I realized I didn’t love (insert girlfriend’s name here).”

Look at her and tell her, echoed by all those versions of your head on televisions, “It’s over.” Trust me, the effect is devastating.

Then, just turn out the lights and leave her in a room with a ton of copies of your face staring at her. Lock her in there for a few hours if you think she needs extra closure.

She says

Keep breakups close to home.

I realize this job relies on a certain sense of anonymity. Otherwise I might get flack for certain…er…opinions that I express in my column, and nothing is worse than an individual taking responsibility for the things he or she writes.

Anyway, I tend to violate that anonymity agreement by consulting my close friends and roommates when I draw a blank on a column topic, and today’s was no different as I consulted my grumpy roommate.

“They want me to write on where to break up with somebody.”

“Where?”

“Yeah. Like at home, or in a restaurant or what.”

“Haha, oh, you know how some people have really elaborate wedding proposals?”

“You mean like, skywriting?”

“Yeah. You should tell them to do it THAT way.”

“Oh god, really?”

“Yeah, ha, imagine it: fireworks spelling out, ‘IT’S NOT YOU, IT’S ME.’”

“Hee hee! ‘ALSO, I WOULD LIKE THAT SWEATER BACK, YOU KNOW, THE ONE YOU BORROWED AT THE BEACH.’”

However unseemly the initial relationship may be, you owe your partner the respect of a
full-bodied breakup. This is where the place comes in.

I’ve heard that you’re supposed to break up with somebody in a public place, like a restaurant. Bad idea. I understand there’s less likelihood your soon-to-be ex-significant other will cause a scene, but a sudden breakup can momentarily unhinge a person, and the restaurant has the opportunity for public humiliation, spaghetti-flinging and the general populace thinking you’re a douche after your date leaves in tears.

So, the restaurant is out.

There is also, as my grumpy roommate alluded to, the possibility of a “distance” breakup, through texts, answering machines or (god forbid) Facebook. All of these are dick moves, and frankly, a coward’s way out.

Suck it up and be a man or a woman and confront him or her in person.

I’d say the best place to break up with somebody is in their place of residence. Call them up, say you’d like to come over and have a talk. Keep it brief, and in the main living area, if possible.

Explain yourself. Don’t be a jerk, but don’t mince words, and as soon as you’re done, leave. This is the beauty of the “their home” breakup (I feel like an ass even having “beauty” and “breakup” in the same sentence).

Your new ex won’t have to walk the streets in tears and embarrass themselves in front of the rest of the world. They have the option of calling their friends or crying alone.

And best of all, they have all of their modes of comfort instantly accessible. Ice cream? BAM. Favorite pillow? BAM. Jerry Maguire on DVD? BAM.

It’s as considerate a breakup as you can manage, and with hope, they’ll keep that in mind when they show up to break your stuff and slander your sexual prowess on the Internet. Good luck with that, champ.

Claire Oliver

Borat is not a journalist.

Normally it wouldn’t be necessary to say this out loud, but recently some others have begged to differ.

Internet Movie Database (yes, I’m that cool) ran a studio briefing reporting the defamation suit against the makers of the film had been thrown out.

The judge presiding over the case explained the film was a commentary on human behavior, and therefore it was protected under the umbrella of media defined as journalism. She said the film shed new light on the American population through its depiction of their “bizarre and offensive” reactions to Sacha Baron Cohen’s “bizarre and offensive” character.

I’m all for laughs, but there is a difference between journalism and entertainment. Journalism works to keep people informed as responsible citizens. Entertainment, on the other hand, is a separate entity, and is not subject to the same standards of accuracy, objectivity and ethics.

Of course not every story can be completely serious, but human interest stories, cartoons and entertainment news cannot be compared to “Borat.” These media do not provoke their subjects to act offensively. They, as subsections of journalism, are there to observe. They are to be neutral, objective and reliable sources.

This was not the intention of Cohen or the other filmmakers involved with the project.

In the film, the character Borat is supposed to be a journalist. I also know the offensive, and in some cases disgusting, actions leave viewers with a newfound humility about just what it means to be American.

The problem comes from the doors opened by the judge’s definition of journalism.

If “Borat” is a commentary on human behavior, then so is “Jackass,” “America’s Funniest Home Videos” and “Jerry Springer.”

Shows that consist primarily of people hitting themselves and others diminishes the respectability of journalism. As a mass communication student aiming to enter the field, I can say with great certainty: This was not why I entered the major.

Undercover reporting sounds extremely cool, but scaring a response out of someone with inappropriate photos or a bear in the back of an ice cream truck are not ethical techniques.

Entertainment is vital, and while I don’t think we should avoid controversial films that push the envelope, these projects should not receive the same protection as objective, accurate and newsworthy subjects do. They should be judged in their own right.

Stacey Barchenger

Part of my job as managing editor for the Review is to check the snail mail and sort through messages in the paper’s e-mail inbox.

I sort through letters, promotions and public relations packages to find things I think student readers would be interested in.

In March, I came across something that, for seniors at least, I thought would be interesting. Sponsored by CareerBuilder.com, Apartments.com and
FreeCreditReport.com, the “What’s Your FQ?” quiz supposedly evaluates graduating students’ chance of making it in the “real” post-graduation world.

According to the press release sent to the Review, the Freedom Quotient is “one final exam for the Class of 2008 that will result in the ultimate payoff to give them a leg up in the real world.”

At first the idea sounded interesting, but 20 questions later, I closed my browser window feeling depressed.

Here are my quiz results; you judge them for yourself:

“Oh Snap! You just missed the last train on the fast track. But, you should be used to it by now. Although you always worked hard throughout college, you just stopped short from going all the way. Don’t get discouraged. While you’ll never make it to the top, your strong work ethic will secure you a fine position in middle management. No worries. Since you’ve never been No. 1, you won’t even know what you are missing.

“Start pinching every penny after putting down the security deposit on your sensible studio. Because you’ll always work for the man, you need to maintain those minimum payments on your student loan, credit cards and car payment. Good credit is all you’ve got!”

I know the purpose of this quiz is to get more business for each of the sponsoring Web sites, as this is exemplified in the list of articles following my quiz results that could “improve my Freedom Quotient,” but whatever happened to a positive and motivational outlook?

I’d like someone from Career Services to take a look at these defeatist quiz results and give me their perspective. I miss the days when counselors and professors told people they can do anything they put their mind to, or they can do anything as long as they work hard. To some, that may seem to be an overly-optimistic mindset, just another thing teachers tell students to make them work harder. But I don’t think so.

Encouragement drives me to work harder. If the quiz tells me there is no hope for achieving my goals, then what is the point of working hard?

Encouragement doesn’t sound anything like “you’ll never make it to the top” to me. As a graduating senior I have accepted that I am an adult, but at the same time, I don’t think that means I need to give up all hope of getting a great job. I’m just starting my adult life.

A biased quiz only aiming to increase business is not something I will ever recommend to students. My Freedom Quotient is rated by the site as a B, and I hate to think about what any lower grade would say.

The only press the “What’s Your FQ?” quiz is getting in this newspaper is the opposite of what it was seeking. Don’t visit the Web site; don’t take the quiz.

Rachael Palinkas

This week, I saw Linfield step it up. Or at least step into the online world. It is a direction they should continue to take, especially considering the number of individuals who rely on these forms of communication.

With housing registration approaching, the time has come to look for roommates. It isn’t as easy as it was when we were incoming freshman at Linfield and the whole process was taken care of for us. Now, it’s up to us to decide who we want to live with or, better yet, who we can stand to live with.

Linfield has created a group on Facebook for students who are looking for a roommate. They have also posted a list of people who need a roommate or roommates in Melrose Hall to reach students without Facebook accounts.

These are fantastic ideas, and I hope they will work out for students, because it can be difficult to find a roommate. I applaud Linfield for recognizing that a place for people to go and look for roommates is helpful for many.

There are a lot of things to consider when deciding who you want to live with for the next year, beyond just personal habits and lifestyles. The feeling can be overwhelming, especially if you’re a freshman and this is the first time going though housing registration.

For those of you who are considering housing options for next year and are finding it a challenge, check out the Facebook group or the list up in Melrose because they will be helpful. But don’t forget to do your research because you want to be happy, too.

Also, remember international students need a place to live and you can volunteer to room with them. It can be a very rewarding experience for each individual and is an opportunity you may never have again.