We all knew Taylor was trouble when she dropped her latest album “Red.” Here we go again with yet another album full of break up songs that leave us asking ourselves, “When will it end?”
The now 23-year-old appeared on the music scene in 2006 with her hit “Our Song.” Clearly, that song meant nothing because she has dropped every single guy she has dated since. She quickly made it to the top of the charts, while at the same time boosting her country cred.
She became an instant hit among the teenie-boppers, as well as practically every single girl on the face of the planet. At the time, we were all awkward middle and high schoolers dealing with the fact that dating was a completely foreign concept. Too bad Taylor only sang about failed relationships. Thanks for the confidence boost. Not.
I will admit, at first her songs were catchy. It was refreshing to hear a girl sing about such subjects that were quite taboo at the time. But after the second break up hit, it got old…and fast. When you analyze the facts, the number of Taylor’s ex’s greatly surpasses the number of tear drops on her guitar. She should be nominated for an episode of “True Life: I can’t stop serial dating boys.”
Let’s move onto her latest album, “Red.” If this was her attempt to be as lame as Carly Rae Jepsen, job well done! As much as I dislike country, her pop album may be worse. We have all seen the edited version of her “I Knew You Were Trouble” video with a goat. (If not, check it out.) That video just proves how ridiculous we find her songs.
Nobody cares about little sweet Taylor trying to be punk. Also, your performance at the Grammy’s was beyond painful to watch. Talk about awkward and a tragic lack of sex appeal. And that passive aggressive dig at One Direction’s Harry Stiles was really mature. Forget “Taylor Nation,” I am a “Directioner” for life!
When it comes down to it, Taylor should go back to country. Honestly, that is where she belongs. Then I would not have to hear her songs on the major radio stations. Also, a little dating tip from me to you, Taylor…stop going through boys like goats go through grass.
In the end, the fact that Taylor can’t keep a boyfriend for longer than the length of one of her songs will make any guy say, “You DON’T belong with me.”
Kate Straube can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.