You better ‘Redneckognize’ about reality television

You can deny it all you want, but Honey Boo Boo is the reality star that we just cannot get enough of.

TLC’s “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” is a show that follows the Georgia-based Thompson family.

The cast includes six-year-old Honey Boo Boo (Alana), mother June, father Sugar Bear, and older sisters Pumpkin, Chickadee, and Chubbs.

Honey Boo Boo made her debut in the pop culture world on the child beauty pageant show “Toddlers and Tiaras,” where she became famous for saying “dolla make me holla” and for rubbing her stomach making a comment about how the “judges don’t know what they are missing.”

So far, the show has gotten overwhelmingly negative reviews, but why does it continue to bring in more than two million views per episode?

It is simple; we are fascinated by Honey Boo Boo and the educational life she leads.

June and Chubbs have taught us that farting is a legitimate form of weight loss.

According to them, if you fart 12-15 times a day, you could lose a lot of weight. Chubbs put this to the test in the premiere episode where the whole family attempts to trim down.

Sadly, it did not work as expected.  But mother June was proud to explain that it is healthy to fart 12-15 times a day, so in that aspect…her daughters are healthy.

Honey Boo Boo has also taught us some valuable vocabulary words. Along with “redneckognize,” “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” has coined many other valuable phrases such as “forklift feet,” which happens when your foot is literally run over by a forklift, “beautimous,” or being extremely attractive, and the “bam bam look.”

The “bam bam look” is an easy fashion statement to pull off. Simply walk into a gas station without shoes on.

Then boom, you’re so trendy that toddler pageants cannot even handle it.

But wait, America, the new vocab lesson does not end here.  To top it off, Honey Boo Boo has brought us two new words for vagina, “biscuit” and “moon pie.”

Lastly comes “vagiggle jaggle” meaning excess skin on your stomach. Reprint the dictionaries because the English language just got an upgrade.

In addition to becoming a pop culture icon, Honey Boo Boo is a lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) supporter.

After learning about her gay uncle, Honey Boo Boo says that it is all right to be gay because “Everyone is a little gay!”

In addition, she was totally supportive of her supposedly gay teacup pig, Glitzy.

It is extremely hard to fit in to society today, but Honey Boo Boo teaches us, why worry about labels? We are all the same anyway.

In the end, Honey Boo Boo is educational. Despite all the haters, she has taught us some valuable lessons.

Losing weight can be as easy as farting. Having a “beautimous vagiggle jaggle” is key to any “bam bam look.” Being gay is socially acceptable, because deep down, we all can’t help ourselves.

When it comes down to it, we cannot get enough of Honey Boo Boo.

That’s why she is being signed for more episodes. Get excited, America, because thanks to TLC we all get to be a part of the Thompson family on Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Do more episodes make you holla? I thought so.

Kate Straube

Photo editor

Kate Straube can be reached at linfieldreviewphotos@gmail.com.

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